The sense in anything

Aimless trips to work, the mechanical drive from one parking lot to another. The nothingness when I look at all the riches.

That look that my eyes get when I realise that I am in the "Its now or never" phase. That greed that fills me, the wisdom that sometimes dawns, all the pretence, all this joy.The expected generalities about everything, the hidden truths about me and all.

All this hope that still floats, a bigger house, a trip abroad, sand between my feet ... the trek in the rain.

The breathing that gets heavier and fear to talk to my diary , madness of not accepting and the lie of living.This fake world that I sometimes hold, should just die.